CHINESE WEDDING: Second Stage of Marriage

After been engagement for about a year or a period agreed by both parties, the weddings will be held. The marriage will be delayed if the death among the families occurred. This is because to show some respects and sympathy. The marriage must be postponed for one year if this situation occurs. But, nowadays, modern Chinese has decrease the duration of time to 100 days only. The traditional bridal costumes usually decorated with gold thread and made from the silk cloth and there are in white, red or yellow in color. The bridal costumes with black, blue and grey in color were strictly prohibited as these colors give the meaning of sadness or death.
On the morning of marriage, the ceremony of decorating hair on the bride will be conducted. The bride's family will invite women who have considered a good luck will come to help decorate the bride hair with women who still have parents and their children. These women will say a good word when binding bun bride.

Then, the groom will take tandu which most Chinese people today are more likely to choose a luxury car with a group of relatives and friends to invite the bride. They will make a sound along the journey to the bride house to create a lively scenario. Next, the groom goes directly to bride's house. When arrived, younger brother of the bride or the nearest male relatives who have not married will open the car door and will be awarded with a red envelope (ang pau).


A woman known as "Sam Poh" will help and guide both bride during marriage ceremony. Prior to invite the bride, the groom need to wait outside while enjoying the sweet bird soup with two eggs served by a man from the bride's family and then he was awarded by a red envelope just like before. This is believed to bring happiness to the lives of marriage couples in their future.
The ceremony will begin with marriage ceremonies to worship ancestors, or better known as the ceremonial "kow tow" in which the bride will be kneeling three times to heaven and earth, ancestors and their parents. Then, the couples will bow to one another and the Tea Ceremony will happen then. The parents of marriage couples will give the ‘ang pau’ to both of them. Besides that, ‘Sam Poh also been awarded the ‘ang pau’ for her contribution in guiding the bride and groom during the marriage ceremony.


Before leaving the house to groom, the ceremony taking photos with relatives and friends will be held. After that, the flower girls will carry a red umbrella to protect the bride to the groom’s transport (or tandu). The relatives of the bride would throw rice, red beans and green beans to her. The Red umbrella is believed will protect the bride from evil spirits, while rice and beans will attract gold chicken that brings good luck.
While awaiting the arrival of bridal couple, a small feast will be held at the groom’s home to entertain relatives, friends and neighbors. After the bride groom arrived at the house, fireworks and music with the sound of gong and drum will be played to celebrate the arrival. The bride will step up above the iron basins that have lighted the flame. It is a ritual to bring happiness and keep away from evil spirits. The ancestor worship ceremonies and drinking tea ceremony will be held again at home as a sign of respect to the family of groom. With this, the couple is already become legally married according to traditional Chinese culture.
(Source: Ann Wan Seng, (1995). Chinese Customs And Taboos. Penerbit Fajar Bakti)

On the night of marriage, the bridal couple will drink wine from two cups tied together by rope and red-colored cross between their hands. Based on Chinese culture, this act is a binding promise of marriage which common has in the Chinese marriage. Then, the bride will be given ladu half cooked and will be asked whether it was raw ladu. The bride must be answered "crude" represents she will bear a child and shows a happy family.
(Source: Ann Wan Seng, (1995). Chinese Customs And Taboos. Penerbit Fajar Bakti).